Why?
by Sharisse
Summary: Jason and Sam have been together for 2 years, he has recently taken over from Sonny as the head of the mob in Port Charles. Sam got shot in Jason's arms but is recovering. The bullet was meant for him, not Sam. Sam has recently found her long lost mother


**Summary**

Jason and Sam have been together for 2 years, he has recently taken over from Sonny as the head of the mob in Port Charles. Sam got shot in Jason's arms but is recovering. The bullet was meant for him, not Sam. Sam has recently found her long lost mother – Alexis, who is married to Ric. They didn't get along prior to the discovery about Sam's parentage. Ric is only her step father. Jason has split up with Sam because of the shooting and she has moved in with Alexis, Ric and her two sisters, Molly and Kristina.

**Why?**

**By Sharisse de Silva**

Her long black wavy hair blew in the wind as her white dress, skimming her knees bellowed backwards from her lean body. Her soft, creamy skin gleamed in the moon's heavy glow. The tears falling from her eyes fell down her face to the lake beneath the bridge she stood on. She watched the ripples fade into her reflection, creating a patter on the surface of the water, distorting her beautiful appearance. Silent, she walked barefoot across the bridge to the bank where she sat with her legs curled up to her chest. The wind grew stronger, and surrounded her as she silently sobbed herself to sleep under the weeping willow.

"Jason", she whispered as she stirred from her sleep, "Jason, don't leave me, come back". As she slowly woke from her dreams, she realised that her one true love was not lying next to her; he hadn't been there for a long time now. She wiped her eyes clean from the early morning dew that had fallen on her long eyelashes, and smoothed down the crumples in her dress and steadied herself as she stood up. Had she really slept outside all night, she asked herself. She softly brushed her fingers over the branches of the weeping willow, remembering times gone by when she and Jason had danced around the tree, wishing she could go back to those times when Jason loved her. All the times he had held her while she slept, watching her sleep, brushing the hair out of her eyes so he could see the whole of her face. All the times they had laughed and joked around together, then fallen into a heavy embrace, as if no one else mattered in the world. How could he have thrown it all away? This was the question she constantly asked herself, over and over again until it drove her mad. She still didn't understand why Jason had decided to give her up, they had been together through worse than this, why was he so stubborn?

She moved her palm down the front of her dress to flatten it further, and as she did so, she noticed the raindrop marks appearing on the fabric. She raised her head to look at the morning sky; it was filling with light grey clouds, about to burst into a heavy downpour of rain. She couldn't stop herself from staring at the sky, closing her eyes as she allowed the drops of water to splash on her face. As they did so, memories came flooding back, of the night when she and Jason shared one of the most magical moments she had ever experienced. When they danced in the rain and Jason carried her in from the rain. She treasured this moment, and kept it close to heart, and although it was so long ago, she pretended she was there right now, right this minute, and her body started swaying to the beat in her memory. She took hold of the hem of her dress and twirled it round her body as she moved and danced around the willow tree. She took so much pleasure from this moment; she thought her heart might burst with joy. She hadn't given herself time to remember the good times with Jason; she was in mourning for their relationship. As she swirled her hair in the rain, she knew there and then what she had to do. She knew.

Alexis knocked on her daughter's bedroom door, she knew how down Sam had been since Jason had not been in her life. "Hey Sam, are you awake yet? I got you some juice", she said as she walked into the room and immediately noticed the empty bed. She walked over to the bedside table and placed the juice on the surface, sitting on the crisp bed-sheets that had not been slept in. The rain was falling heavily now, and so Alexis went to close the window to stop the water from pouring into the room and saw a white figure moving in the garden behind her house. The figure was so graceful and elegant that Alexis couldn't take her eyes from it. It wasn't until the figure started to stop moving and started falling to the ground beneath the willow tree that Alexis realised it was her daughter. And she was in trouble.

Alexis ran out of the house, over the bridge and knelt at the side of her daughter who had just collapsed in front of her eyes. "Sam, Sam, Sam please wake up, please." Alexis begged her daughter to open her eyes but nothing would wake her. She screamed for help, and her husband, who was making breakfast for Kristina and Molly, their other daughters, came to her aid, cell phone in hand. As he dialled the number for General Hospital, Alexis held Sam's head in her hands, praying to God to make Sam stronger and wake up. Alexis knew that Sam was too weak to have been out in the rain for as long as she had been; her immune system had been worn down by the gunshot wound inflicted by one of Manny Ruiz's hit men, although it was intended for Jason, not Sam. Alexis could never forgive Jason for this, but she knew that her daughter's heart had been taken by him a long time ago. As she ran her hands through Sam's hair, she glanced down to the gypsy dress she was wearing and saw the blood smeared down the front of the dress. Alexis' screams echoed through the entire garden and house. Ric ran back to the house to arrange for Kristina and Molly to be cared for by Viola, the nanny. As he went back to the house, an ambulance arrived to take Sam to General Hospital. Alexis sat next to Sam as she was hooked up to various machines and Ric followed the ambulance in his car, praying that Sam would be ok, not only for her own sake, but for his wife's sake, he didn't think she could cope with any more stress or grief in her life. She had just found her daughter; it was too upsetting to imagine that she could lose her in the same month.

Jason held onto Sam as she slept, watching her delicate eyelashes flutter as she dreamt, hopefully about him, he thought. He closed his eyes and thought about the day he proposed to her in the hospital. He knew then and there that he never wanted to let her go, he didn't want her to come to any harm, and if she was by his side, she would always be protected. He pictured himself clinging onto the love of his life in that hospital room, he wished that moment would never end. The moment she said yes for the second time, although it might as well have been the first time as he had just recovered from major brain surgery. "I love you, Sam", the words echoed through his mind. Then the door opened behind Jason as he embraced his new fiancé and Manny Ruiz stood there with a pistol pointing at Sam, although Jason was shielding her, the bullet somehow shot through his leather jacket and his body and went into Sam's heart. Her blood started pouring onto the floor, over her engagement ring, through the cracks of the diamond and onto his leather jacket. Jason awoke with a scream, and realised he was alone in his apartment. He sat up and realised that for the tenth time in row, he had fallen asleep on the sofa. He used to love to watch Sam fall asleep in his arms on the sofa; he would cover her with a blanket and watch her for hours and hours until he joined her in her dream world. He moved over to the mantelpiece and picked up a photograph taken a long time ago, Sam was wearing a white gypsy dress that fell off her shoulders revealing her tanned skin from their time in Hawaii. The way she looked at the camera made him feel that he was the only person in her world, and he used to love that feeling, now he detested remembering that emotion. He had resolved to not let himself feel that way about anyone ever again, especially not Sam. How could he have been so selfish as to allow himself to fall in love with such a perfect woman? It wasn't fair on either one of them, he knew from the start that Sam was different to all the women he had been with before, she was stronger and had a determination about her that was so attractive to him. He had never met a freer spirited yet ambitious woman in his life, and when he realised he was in love with her, it was so unexpected he couldn't quite believe it, yet it seemed so obvious. They were meant to be together. That was then, when he was naïve, Jason thought. The business wasn't solely his to worry about, Sonny was his boss and he was simply the enforcer. Now that Jason had taken control of the business, his life had changed. His priorities had changed, and that meant that his relationship with Sam was inevitably going to change as well. It wasn't as if he didn't want to be with Sam, he just couldn't be with her. As he stared at the picture, his eyes began to fill with water; he couldn't let himself feel like this anymore. He had to let her go. Even if he didn't want to. He threw the picture against the far wall, smashing the glass and breaking the frame. As he wiped away the tears forming in his eyes the telephone rang and his heart skipped a beat. He had a bad feeling about this. He answered the telephone, "Jason? It's Liz; you need to come to the hospital straight away. It's Sam."

Sam lay on the stretcher surrounded by the white skirt of her gypsy dress. "She looks like an angel", Alexis kept repeating through her tears. The colour in Sam's face had diminished since getting into the ambulance. Her usually rosy cheeks had been flooded with white, and her skin looked like chalk. Her chest rose and fell at erratic intervals, her breathing had been impaired due to the gun shot wound, and now there seemed to be complications as a result of Dr. Drake's earlier surgery. Alexis and Ric were forced to wait in the family room while Dr. Drake took care of Sam, despite Alexis' constant refusals to this. "What if she never wakes up? I can't lose her again. I won't let her leave me, Ric. It's not fair, it's just not fair. What has she done to deserve all this pain?" Ric comforted his wife as he silently prayed to God to save Sam; he didn't want his family to suffer anymore. He loved his wife completely and adored his two children, and even though he and Sam had never got along, he had started to warm to the idea of living with her and being her stepfather. He didn't want her to die.

Jason went straight to the nurse's station where Liz was expecting him. "What's happening? Where's Sam?" Liz told him what had happened, and ushered him to where she was being operated on by Dr. Drake. Jason was alone outside the operating theatre; he didn't know what to do or why he was there. He had decided to let her go, but his heart betrayed him when Liz had called to say that Sam had had complications with her surgery. The familiar feeling of loss enveloped his heart in the same way they did when Sam had got shot in his arms. She had been through so much recently; he knew that one day her heart would not be able to take anymore. She certainly wasn't as strong as she was before the shooting, and with the extra stress of losing her soul mate, Jason knew that her life really was hanging in the balance this time. "What the hell are you doing here?" a voice bellowed behind him, making Jason suddenly look behind him. Alexis was standing there, her face and eyes swollen because she had been crying so much. Ric was holding her shoulder and standing behind her, staring at Jason in disbelief that he was actually there. "Liz called me and told me that Sam was here. Ric told her to call me." Alexis spun round to face her husband. "Why did you do that? After everything Sam's gone through because of him! How dare you do this Ric? How could you?" Alexis started pounding on Ric's chest until she gave into her tears and fell into his arms. "Thank you for coming" Ric silently mouthed to Jason, who nodded in appreciation. Ric took Alexis to the side of the room and sat her down.

"Sam would want him to be here, Alexis. You know that. Despite everything that he has put her through, Sam is still in love with Jason. He's the love of her life", Ric told his wife. Alexis took some deep breaths before nodding her head and wiping the hair from her eyes. "You know, I've never noticed this before, but you and Sam have the same eyes. She'll be ok. She has to be." Ric assured her. Jason stood looking through the window into the operating theatre, not wanting to take his eyes away in case he could catch a glimpse of Sam, but there was only a sea of green scrubs worn by the doctor's and nurses in the theatre. As he closed his eyes, he was taken back to the time when baby Lila was born and Sam's life was in danger. The hardest thing he ever had to do was to tell Sam that Lila didn't make it. Her face will be etched in his mind for all eternity when he told her, total and utter despair. He never wanted to experience that again. Jason was a strong and powerful man, but even though he never showed it, he did have emotions like any one else. He just didn't show them in case someone broke down his defence and caught him off guard. That, he had learned in the past, was the most dangerous thing he could ever do.

Patrick Drake came out of the theatre, holding his operating mask in his trembling hands. Alexis and Ric stood up as he entered the room, Jason simply turned to face him. "I don't know what to say. The stitches that I did on Sam last week, well, they just weren't there. They had come away from her body, making her bleed excessively and causing her to haemorrhage. There is no explanation for it. I am totally mystified, it has to be said. She has fallen into a coma, however, because of the extreme blood loss, so all we can do is monitor her and keep her comfortable for now". Alexis burst out crying while Ric held her; the room was silent until Patrick left. Jason sat down and put his head in his hands, not knowing what to do. "How could stitched just disappear? Is he incompetent or something?" Alexis pondered out loud, desperate for answers. "I have no idea honey, maybe it's just one of those things, I don't know what to say. Maybe we can go see her, come on". Ric guided her out of the room as Liz walked in to see Jason.

"What was Patrick talking about when he said that the stitches weren't there?" Jason quietly asked Liz. "Patrick sent me to come see you when Alexis wasn't here. It looks like she unpicked the stitches herself. She had blood on her hands as if she had been scratching at them. The bandage and packing from the wound wasn't there. I guess Alexis or Ric didn't see it on the floor because of the shock. Do you think she would be capable of doing that?" Jason stared at the floor, knowing that she would. "Maybe she would. Maybe she had had enough of the pain and the pressure I've put on her by not seeing her or being with her. Do you honestly think it was self-inflicted?" Liz nodded and softly walked out the room, sensing that Jason needed to be alone.

Jason felt his pulse race as he thought through the last time he saw Sam. The words he spoke resounded in his mind, "It's over." How could he have been so harsh to her? Why did he have to be so stubborn? He was sure that Sam had asked herself the same questions. Sam knew that he was a determined and stubborn man, but this was taking it too far. Jason realised this now. He also realised that it might be too late. If Sam had unpicked the stitches herself, that meant she had given up on the world. Given up on him. It was his fault. He would never forgive himself if she didn't survive. Jason stood up and walked to where Sam was attached to a machine which continued to beep, showing she was alive. Alexis was holding her hand, tenderly speaking to her daughter while Ric sat beside her, simply listening and watching his step daughter breathe in and out. Ric noticed Jason at the door and beckoned him to come inside. He whispered something to Alexis which made her rise from her seat, lean to kiss Sam on the forehead and leave the room. Jason edged tentatively towards Sam's bedside. He sat next to her and kissed her hand. He stared at her pale face with her shooting star necklace shining on her long, graceful neck.

"I don't know what to say. Except that I love you, Sam. I never wanted to hurt you, I thought I was doing the right thing but obviously I was wrong. I thought I would be selfish if we stayed together. I wanted you to be safe, but even when I'm not by your side you suffer. I don't want to see you suffer anymore, please come back to me, Sam. I can't live another day without you next to me, supporting me, loving me. Please Sam, don't leave me. I never wanted to leave you. You're everything to me. You're my world". Jason gently kissed her hand, noticing her engagement ring had swirls on blood caught in the ridges of the diamond, just like he had dreamt. He gasped as he focussed on the ring; it was like he had had a premonition about this. Like they were linked together in a spiritual way. Jason wasn't the type of man to believe in fate or destiny, and neither did he have a very spiritual side to his character, but in this moment, he realised that the dream was a warning to him. Their minds and souls had been fused together from the moment they fell in love, and Jason broke down crying at her side.

Jason looked up and saw his princess staring back at him, dressed in her white gypsy dress, smiling. She reached out her hand to his, and he went towards her without hesitation. She took his by the hand and led him to the willow tree. As she gazed into his eyes, he leant in and kissed her tenderly, cherishing the moment that their lips met, wishing it would never end. As they parted, she started swaying her hips and giggled as she made him dance along with her. Jason began to laugh and followed her around the tree, grabbing her and dancing with her for what seemed a lifetime. Eventually, he caught up with her and embraced her, staring into her eyes and told her that he loved her. As he leant to kiss her for a second time, she whispered in his ear, "This is where you can find me. I'll always be here. I love you, Jason". As he leant back to look at Sam, she was gone. He was alone. And then he knew. He knew.

Jason woke up to a steady beeping sound, still holding Sam's hand, but knowing already what had happened. Liz, Epiphany and Patrick ran into the room and made Jason move away from Sam. Alexis and Ric came running behind them, both of them in shock at what was happening. After ten minutes of trying their hardest to resuscitate Sam, they had to give up. She was gone. Alexis collapsed crying next to her daughter, yelling for an answer from God as to why he had to take her away from her. Ric started to cry and knelt down next to his wife, holding her and rocking her back and forth to calm her down, even though he knew it was futile. Jason just stood at the back of the room, expressionless as he stared at Sam's lifeless body. Patrick, Liz and Epiphany quietly gave their condolences and left the room. Jason knew he couldn't handle being around Alexis and Ric and so promptly went home. He had to be alone.

He walked into his empty apartment and threw his keys on the table. As he closed the door he looked downwards and saw the broken frame and glass on the floor. He bent down to pick up the photograph and dropped down to the floor in realisation of what had happened. As the fresh faced, beautiful girl gazed up at him from the photograph, his heart broke and the tears fell from his eyes onto the picture. All he had left were the memories. You can't touch memories, he thought. As he started to breathe deeply, he knew where he had to go to meet up with her again. He needed to go to the willow tree.

Jason arrived at Alexis' house and there were no lights on in the house, obviously Alexis was still at the hospital. He went to the back of the house where the bridge connected it to the bank and the spot where he and Sam had shared so many fantastic times. As he walked over to the tree he saw the moon's reflection glimmering on the water underneath the bridge. He stood and watched the water flowing and moving beneath him, wishing she was standing next to him. He just wanted to hold her one more time. Kiss her one more time. Tell her that he loved her again. He glanced up to look at the willow tree and saw a white figure underneath its branches. He ran to the tree, hoping she had returned to him, but when he got there the figure was gone. There was nothing there. He saw the bandage that Liz had told him about. She did it, he thought, she did it to herself. He sat on the bank, looking outwards, thinking that this was the last view she ever saw. As he looked to the tree he saw something shimmering under its branches. He got up and approached the object. It was her shooting star necklace. As he picked it up and held it, he was sure that he had noticed it when she was in the hospital. How could it have been on her body a few hours ago but now be here? He decided that he was just tired and held onto it as tightly as he could, remembering how happy she had been when he gave it to her. He took one last look at the tree, said that he would come back every day to be near her and walked back to the house. The white figure stepped out from the tree and watched him leave. She blew him a kiss as he walked over the bridge. "I'll be waiting Jason." She smiled as she sat under the branches and fell asleep. This is where you can find her.


End file.
